More Like OkStupid

Hallie Bateman tries dating on OkCupid and finds that she prefers online profiles to the people behind them.

Why Things Happen

They say everything happens for a reason. It turns out they are right. Mark Peters explains.

Staff List: Stories Our Parents Told Us

The Bureau Staff on their parents’ tallest tales.

New Patient Information

Jeremy Blachman would like to welcome you to the doctor’s office. Please have a seat and read through these new rules and policies.

Staff List: Our Oldest Files

The Bureau Staff does a bit of hard drive archaeology to uncover embarrassing documents, emails, and images of days past.

Days of the Month

Bored by only seven distinct days of the week, Mark Peters proposes 24 more days to fit in the month.

Alternative Valentine’s Day Cards

Running with the notion that “everyone deserves love,” Ben and Hallie Bateman have penned and illustrated Valentine’s Day cards for, well, everyone.

Jay McInerney Celebrates Chinese New Year and Reads Your Zodiac Sign

Jonathan San talks to Jay McInerney, who brings the bitter, depressed prose of his novels to horoscopes.

Hold the Everything: A Food Plainist’s Lament

Luke Epplin likes his food bland and simple — why is that so hard to explain?

Staff List: Songs of Christmas

The Bureau Staff digs up the best and worst renditions of their favorite Christmas carols.

A Mannequin in a Brooks Brothers Display Window Awakens to Discover That He Has Been Dressed for Summer

Sloan Schang is a mannequin of wealth and taste.

Overhearing

In a world where people talk too much, Hallie Bateman prefers to listen.