Ben Bateman is surprised that you didn’t respond to him immediately.

Ben Bateman has advice if you’re going to make the most of being the token fat kid in this cartoon caper.

According to Eli Terry, the key to succeeding at everything involves a lot of ham.

With all the attention the human race has paid to planet Earth recently, Rebecca Cardwell thinks, frankly, it’s time for the planet to return the favor.

Nick Martens presents a handy quiz to help your liberal arts-induced existential loneliness.

Nick Martens would like you to stop making assumptions about his line of work. It really makes you look stupid.

Joe Berkowitz would like to explain why he was speeding.

Ralph Gamelli defends his snow-inspired aggressive tendencies.

As Nathan Pensky’s assistant, you’ll need to know how to deal with raccoons, ghosts, and “sex parties.” But don’t worry, this guide is quite comprehensive.

First dates can be tricky, but Joe Berkowitz has all the right moves.