- Replace your header with an American Apparel ad for the day.
- Declare yourself an “old media” publication and try to sell yourself to a Chinese conglomerate.
- Declare yourself a “new media” publication and shamelessly imitate The Awl.
- Get drunk and play Rock Band at Kevin’s until his upstairs neighbors come down and tell you to be quiet (oh wait, that’s every Wednesday).
- Have your brilliant illustrator salvage your cop-out list:
Illustration by Hallie Bateman